Paws Salute and Ass Talk

/sweat

Yes, due to out of boredomness at home. I was finally able to drag myself to the computer to make a blog. Part of it was because another fella blogger, Fishie, is well, blogging too. And that fella being my best friend. And I only think it's fair that she gets to read my blog too.

This blog is probably going to be uneventful until I goes to Japan where anything can happen. Hopefully the good stuff.

Yesterday, I went for my Art class like, 15 minutes early. Clearly, the class is empty except for my overweight teacher, nicknamed Alien, who sat on his desk fooling around with his Macbook. He stared at me as if I'm crazy and asked me why I had arrived so early. I ignored him as usual and he just shook his head and started a pretty random conversation.

Among all other topics we could converse in, he have to talk about asses. Don't even ask me how it started. It's like, all of a sudden he goes: "Do my butt look bigger than Kimmy's?"

Kimmy is another teacher in my art class who is also a little chubby. Since Alien is shorter, so he looks fatter to me. I nodded nonchalantly and he just swerved the topic around me.

Alien: You know... It really makes me wonder. How come you don't often see fat Japanese girls? They all either look thin or normal or just slightly rounded but not fat like those Ah Soh and Indian aunties you see in Pasar Malam.

Me: Because... they exercise? Do you know that the amount of pedestrians in Japan is much more higher than in Malaysia? Most Japanese walk to train stations and take trains.

Alien:....I wonder how Sumo people get that fat... (changing subtopic again)

Me: They eat a large serving of Sukiyaki and sleep right after that to put on weight.

Alien: How come you know that? You stalk them?

Me: ... I'm not you.

Alien: I can almost imagine you marrying a Sumo guy.

Me: That will not happen even if I die and reincarnated a hundred times.

Alien: You can't say for sure. Maybe you'll grow really fat in years to come and become interested in guys with big butts.

Me: What makes you so sure I'm gonna get big butts in a few years to come. That's more likely to be you.

Alien: C'mon. It'll be so much fun. The Sumo guy can lift you up with one hand! Give you a free 'Aeroplane Ride'

"My so-called aeroplane ride"

Me:... You are so.... Immature for a guy reaching his early forties.

And he kept on going about how big butts guy can keep you warm during winter, it was like talking about himself actually. The randomly conjured up topic went on for about 20 minutes, where the most part of it, he was talking to himself since I don't want to get involved with his perverted fantasies.

He totally annoyed me with his endless ass talk and it got even worse when one of my artmate showed up.

Alien: So, do you prefer guys with big butts or small butts?

Washy (nicknamed, he's a guy btw): ... I prefer girls.